Don’t Have “A Failure To Communicate” With Carter Crabtree

Carter Crabtree says: “Okay. You Brought The Jack Daniels. Good.” Learn more and Leave a message below.

Let’s start with this.

Carter Crabtree is a Florida BOY, NOT a “Florida MAN” The ‘Man’ version comes in many shapes, sizes, and mentalities. He typically makes news headlines. The yet-to-be-studied Florida Man is a modern, scarily accurate, representation of the crazy shit that occurs daily here in The Sunshine State. Little known secret: ‘Florida Man’ is an elusive creature by nature. They are a part of a small cabal and have the secret sauce in knowing how and when to show up in weird situations, especially if cops are involved.

That’s not me.

A ‘Florida Boy’ is a totally different creature. The photos on this page are of my great-grandfather and his family (mother’s side) taken in 1915 in North Florida, not far from seductive Steinhatchee. The young lady in the center of the photo is my grandmother, Letha Faulkner. She turned into a true Southern Biddy. Much of my family was born and raised in Florida. Family history goes back to at least the mid-1850s, best I can tell.

You may be asking what all this has to do with Carter Crabtree. Well, Carter Crabtree is me, Wally Balleau. The great-grandson of Thomas Faulkner, a Florida Boy (on my mother’s side). He’s the man in the picture with the mustache.

Me, I was born in 1952 and did many things. Being from Florida, I watched this whole, insane shooting match unfold. And, while I cherish my youth here, the landscape has changed dramatically and not for the better.

In my older age, I decided it would be a good thing to take my past skills and apply them…now. The result is this little corner of the Internet Universe. It’s called:  www.badflorida.com. It’s full of tricks, I think.

I have stared at that photo and into the eyes of my great-grandfather, and the name Carter Crabtree came to mind. In order to do what I wanted, I needed a name change, and Carter Crabtree came to mind. Think pseudonym: Samuel Clemens (a.k.a. Mark Twain) or Benjamin Franklin (a.k.a. Poor Richard’s Almanac) as examples. Even Stephen King did it, for cryin’ out loud. In other words, a different method of getting a message across.

So, I asked my great-grandfather, “You okay with me using your picture and a different name?” His answer, “I don’t what the hell you’re doin’. But okay. Just eat what you kill.”

Thank you, great-granddaddy, for your patience and understanding. And, to those who actually took the time to read this, Carter Crabtree thanks you, too.

You are invited to comment or suggest something human and meaningful:

You can leave an email here: crabtree@badflorida.com

Thank you kindly,

Carter Crabtree